Showing results by author "Dustin Gross" in All Categories

In this wildly irreverent fantasy parody, four extremely unqualified adventurers are chosen to save the world—or at least not make it worse. Grogthar the Blood-Spiller: a shirtless barbarian with more biceps than brain cells. Tinsel: an elven rogue with sticky fingers and zero morals. Kevin: a depressed necromancer whose horse might be more competent than he is. Arlandio DuFlair: a bard with the libido of a god and the self-awareness of a rock.

In the chaos of post-plague France, a bastard noble, a disgraced knight, a cunning thief, and a blasphemous priest embark on a treacherous journey to reclaim a stolen birthright. Betrayal lurks in every shadow, and the Hundred Years’ War has made mercenaries cheap—but loyalty even cheaper. As assassins, warlords, and scheming nobles close in, survival demands wit, steel, and a willingness to gamble it all. In The Ale-Stained Chronicles, honor is a myth—only the ruthless endure.

The Bible: History’s most dramatic, chaotic, and WTF-inducing book... now with 100% more sarcasm. Ever wondered why God created a talking snake, why Noah willingly signed up for the worst cruise in history, or why the Book of Revelation reads like a metal album fever dream? Welcome to HOLY WTF, the irreverent, side-splittingly funny deep dive into the weirdest, wildest, and most WTF moments in the Bible. With sharp wit, dark humor, and surprisingly insightful biblical analysis, HOLY WTF is perfect for skeptics, believers, history nerds, and anyone who thinks theology could use a little comedy.

Damien is a washed-up exorcist who never believed in happy endings—until one of his cursed blog posts goes viral. Now he’s “The Loveorcist,” a foul-mouthed, whiskey-loving relationship guru for the haunted and heartbroken. Too bad his most persistent fan is a beautiful demon named Lilith…who might be falling for him.

Struggling to function as a responsible adult? You’re not alone. How to Put On Your Underwear and Other Life Hacks is your brutally honest, laugh-out-loud guide to surviving everyday chaos—bad alarms, awkward small talk, and grocery store blackouts. Because let’s be real: adulting is a scam, and we’re all winging it.

Ever wondered why gods are so obsessed with smiting people? Or why religious rules seem oddly fixated on what you can and can’t eat? Holy Crap: A Guide to World Religions takes you on a wildly entertaining ride through the world’s biggest faiths—roasting the absurdities, appreciating the wisdom, and answering life’s big questions (like whether Zeus would survive a paternity test). If you love history, mythology, and humor, this book is your next binge-listen.

Basic training was a disaster. His first mission was worse. But somehow, Private Johnny Durham is still alive—and that’s the real miracle. What happens when the world’s most unlucky soldier stumbles his way through the ranks of the U.S. Army? Absolute chaos.

What do you get when you mix a cranky God, a bunch of emotionally fragile prophets, 613 commandments, and a whole lot of carbs? A sacred mess called Judaism—and this hilariously dysfunctional guide is here to make sense of it all. In Oy Vey Almighty, we dive headfirst into the wonders and weirdness of Jewish faith, history, rituals, and culture—from Abraham’s awkward parenting to Moses' divine burnout, from Shabbat naps to Passover plagues.

Whether you’re dealing with needy coworkers, guilt-tripping relatives, or friends who only show up when they need a favor, this audiobook arms you with real-world strategies—and laugh-out-loud lines—to say no like a pro.

They told him to shrink. He chose to suplex society instead. Ricky "Napalm" Stubbs just got fired for body-slamming a vending machine—and that was before the smart scale insulted his BMI in a British accent. Unemployed, overweight, and overwhelmingly pissed off, Ricky creates the Chunky Combat Club: a secret underground league for misfits who are thicc, ticked, and totally over it.

The sacred. The sinful. The stupid. Tequila is all of it—and this is your lime-salted, smoke-soaked guide to surviving it. There are books about tequila—and then there’s this unholy gospel of agave-fueled madness. The Book of Tequila: Glory, Regret, and Other Sacred Traditions is your laugh-out-loud, profanity-laced, weirdly informative guide to the most dangerous spirit on Earth.

Adulting is a scam, and you’ve been tricked into playing. Bills, burnout, awkward family gatherings—nobody warned you it’d be this chaotic. How to Survive Life Without Totally Screwing It Up is the brutally honest, laugh-out-loud survival guide you didn’t know you needed. Packed with real talk, questionable advice, and the reassurance that nobody has it figured out, this book is your go-to for navigating life’s absurdity with (mostly) your sanity intact.

They stole his bread. They mocked his speech. Now, he's taking it all back—one quack at a time. Meet Thaddaeus McQuack: a furious, foul-mouthed duck with a grudge the size of a city pond and a speech impediment that only makes his threats funnier. After a mime-related incident lands him in a zoo, Thaddaeus breaks free—and declares war on mankind. With a deranged cockatoo named Steve, a flying squirrel militia, and a revolution built on stale bread and pure rage, Duck Off: The Quack Chronicles is a wild, action-packed satire you never knew you needed.

Love watches but don’t have a trust fund? Think collecting great timepieces means spending thousands? Think again. Watches for the Rest of Us is the ultimate guide to building a killer watch collection—without breaking the bank. From $50 Casios to $500 Seikos, this book shows you how to find hidden gems, avoid scams, and buy the right watches for the right reasons—all while keeping your bank account intact.

Drink Like a Legend. Or at Least Like a Pirate. Rum is more than just a drink—it’s a lifestyle, a statement, and possibly the best bad decision you’ll ever make. Whether you’re a rum rookie or a seasoned sipper, this book delivers hard-earned wisdom, hilarious insights, and a guide to drinking rum like a legend.

A foul-mouthed fairy. A princess with an axe. A kingdom one bar fight away from collapse. Exiled from the Fairy Realm for “excessive profanity and reckless endangerment” (a total misunderstanding, really), Flit is stuck in the mortal world—where everyone is far too tall, not nearly drunk enough, and weirdly obsessed with quests. All he wants is a stiff drink and to be left alone. Instead, he gets kidnapped by a princess who thinks he’s her magical sidekick.

Captain Rufus “Sweet Smellin’” McGraw is not your ordinary pirate. While most cutthroats plunder gold and rum, McGraw has a more refined obsession—the world’s rarest and most intoxicating scents. And he’ll rob, swindle, or seduce anyone to get them.

Ancient Egypt was a mess. The gods were dramatic, the afterlife was full of bureaucratic nightmares, and crocodiles were way too involved in politics. Packed with sarcastic commentary, ridiculous myths, and historically accurate nonsense, this book is perfect for history nerds, mythology fans, and anyone who loves their gods with a side of snark. Whether you're a mythology expert or just here for the chaos, Holy Crocodiles! is your ultimate crash course in divine dysfunction.

The fate of America rests in the hands of a washed-up stuntman, a foul-mouthed ex-wrestler, and a woman who should’ve taken another job offer. Duke Thunder wasn’t supposed to run for president. But after a bar fight, a stolen VHS tape, and a deep-state assassination attempt, he had no choice. Now, he’s leading a beer-fueled revolution, exposing conspiracies that shouldn’t exist, and rewriting the Constitution—with his fists. But shadowy forces want him gone. The Woke Mafia, the Deep State, and Hollywood elites have declared war.

Ever fantasized about ghosting Thanksgiving—and your entire family? How to Quit Your Family (Without Getting Arrested) is your brutally honest, laugh-out-loud roadmap to freedom from toxic relatives, guilt-ridden holidays, and generational dysfunction.