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we are NOT the SAME

we are NOT the SAME

By: Heather Gardner and Lacey Joseph
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We Are Not the Same: Join our comedic journey as Bodybuilder Barbie flexes her muscles against Daria’s dry wit! Dive into the hilarity of life’s twists and turns through the eyes of two contrasting besties who prove that different perspectives lead to the best stories. Tune in for laughs, randomness, and a sprinkle of chaos!





© 2025 we are NOT the SAME
Episodes
  • Trauma-Rama: When Life Gives You Lemons (Or Tiny Ankles)
    Jun 16 2025

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    The wounds we carry from childhood often define how we navigate adulthood, especially in our relationships. In this deeply personal episode, we pull back the curtain on our experiences growing up with alcoholic parents and how these early traumas shaped who we've become.

    From functioning alcoholics who maintained perfect appearances while chaos reigned behind closed doors, to unpredictable substance abuse that created volatile home environments—we share the raw reality of growing up in households where adult protection was unreliable at best. The conversation reveals how these experiences created our "hyper-independent" tendencies, with both of us developing a fierce self-reliance that made asking for help nearly impossible.

    We explore the painful patterns that emerged in our adult relationships, particularly with manipulative partners who recognized and exploited our vulnerabilities. One host describes the gradual erosion of self-worth through constant negative reinforcement, while the other shares how betrayal by someone close to her children created new layers of trauma for her family. Through these stories, we examine how childhood wounds make us susceptible to harmful relationships, and how recognizing these patterns is the first step toward breaking them.

    The episode also touches on healing methods that have worked for us—from the structure and discipline of bodybuilding to learning how to identify red flags earlier. We discuss the delicate balance between protecting ourselves and remaining open to genuine connection, and how parenting our own children has motivated us to break generational cycles of trauma.

    This conversation marks the beginning of a deeper exploration into trauma and recovery. If you've ever felt alone in your struggles with childhood wounds or toxic relationships, this episode offers validation, understanding, and a reminder that healing—while never linear—is always possible.

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    47 mins
  • Healing Through Dissociation: Our Journey with Therapeutic Ketamine
    Jun 9 2025

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    Have you ever wanted to peek behind the curtain of an emerging mental health treatment that's changing lives? Step into our world as we share our raw, unfiltered experiences with ketamine therapy—recorded just hours after Heather's infusion session.

    Ketamine therapy isn't just another wellness trend. This FDA-approved treatment is revolutionizing mental health care by helping people process trauma, reduce anxiety, and break free from treatment-resistant depression. We take you through our parallel journeys—Heather as she completes booster treatments and Lacey during her initial six-session protocol—offering candid insights you won't find in clinical descriptions.

    From the bizarre sensation of "dissolving" to feeling like you're living inside Fantasia, we describe what dissociation actually feels like and why it's therapeutic rather than frightening. We share practical advice about setting intentions, choosing the right music (hint: skip the lyrics), and what to expect physically as your body processes the medicine. The conversation reveals surprising benefits neither of us expected, including dramatic reductions in physical inflammation and muscle tension that linger long after treatment ends.

    Whether you're considering ketamine therapy for yourself, supporting someone who is, or simply curious about cutting-edge mental health treatments, this episode offers valuable perspective from two different people at different stages of the ketamine journey. Listen as we flip-flop between patient and caretaker roles, proving that healing doesn't have to be a solo journey. Ready to explore what happens when we allow our minds to access parts of ourselves we've kept hidden? Join us for this intimate look at what happens when we let go and allow healing to happen.

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    44 mins
  • What happens when two friends barely see each other for months?
    Jun 5 2025

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    We've returned for Season 3 after months apart, with both of us navigating wildly different paths from bodybuilding competitions to wedding preparations. Our separate journeys finally converge as we catch up on everything we've missed.

    • Multiple trips to Florida for cheer competitions where both kids performed well and hit "zero deduction" routines
    • Intense bodybuilding prep including doing cardio while watching the kids playing in the pool
    • Day-of show nutrition strategies involving bags of rice, rice cakes, pancakes and almond butter
    • Palm Springs bachelorette weekend coinciding with Stagecoach festival, requiring creative transportation solutions
    • Being "kicked out" by another rheumatologist despite ongoing health issues and suspected Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome
    • Both participating in ketamine therapy for mental health (more details in next week's episode)
    • Adjusting to major life changes including quitting jobs and children becoming high school seniors
    • Summer plans including hiking and spending more time together

    Stay tuned for next week's episode where we'll discuss our experiences with ketamine therapy!


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    48 mins
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