Episodes

  • I’m always telling Sorcha to tone down the southside when we come out to Bray but she never listens

    I’m always telling Sorcha to tone down the southside when we come out to Bray but she never listens
    Jun 20 2025

    I’m like, “Bray?”


    And Sorcha’s there, “Yes, Ross – Bray!”


    I’m like, “But why do we have to go to Bray?” sounding like a spoiled child – in other words, one of ours.


    irishtimes.com

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    7 mins
  • ‘I haven’t really been living before now,’ Brett tells his wife. ‘Ross has slept with more than 800 women’

    ‘I haven’t really been living before now,’ Brett tells his wife. ‘Ross has slept with more than 800 women’
    Jun 13 2025

    So it’s, like, ridiculous o’clock on a Saturday morning – we’re talking nine, ten, something like that – and I hear a ring on the front doorbell, followed, a short time later, by the sound of a woman’s voice going, “Is this the home of Ross O’Carroll-Kelly?”


    irishtimes.com

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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    6 mins
  • ‘I’m not even a bit stressed,’ Honor goes, ‘I haven’t done a focking tap for these exams’

    ‘I’m not even a bit stressed,’ Honor goes, ‘I haven’t done a focking tap for these exams’
    Jun 6 2025

    Sorcha thinks we should maybe check on Honor and there’s an air of definite excitement in her voice when she says it? Yeah, no, it’s the night before the stort of the Leaving Cert and my wife is absolutely determined that this should be one of those mother-daughter moments...



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    6 mins
  • He obviously decided that he’d wasted his life, focusing on career, marriage and family goals

    He obviously decided that he’d wasted his life, focusing on career, marriage and family goals
    May 30 2025

    Sorcha tells me that I need to do something and obviously, I’m like, “Er – as in?”


    Yeah, no, Angela – the wife of my brother slash half-brother – has been on the phone from the States and Sorcha is running out of excuses....

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    6 mins
  • We’ve been through so much. I slept with two of JP’s ex-girlfriends, and Christian’s actual mother and even that didn’t break us up

    We’ve been through so much. I slept with two of JP’s ex-girlfriends, and Christian’s actual mother and even that didn’t break us up
    May 23 2025
    “So this dude here,” Oisinn goes – and he means me, “he tucks the ball under his orm, beats five players and crosses the try-line under the posts. But he doesn’t ground the ball there. No, he puts it down in the corner to make the conversion horder for himself"...

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    7 mins
  • Honor goes, ‘People will talk about my speech for years to come. And that’s just in the libel courts’

    Honor goes, ‘People will talk about my speech for years to come. And that’s just in the libel courts’
    May 18 2025
    My daughter is giving the valedictory at the Mount Anville graduation, and there’s a little something in it for everyone

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    7 mins
  • Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘My old dear doesn’t have the embarrassment gene. It’s a South Dublin thing’

    Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘My old dear doesn’t have the embarrassment gene. It’s a South Dublin thing’
    May 9 2025
    So – yeah, no – the old dear is in the swimming pool when we rock up to the nursing home, doing her – I don’t know – hydrotherapy exercises? She’s dancing to Shania Twain’s Man! I Feel Like a Woman! while holding a beach ball and she has singlehandedly cured me of my fetish for women in wet swimwear.

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    7 mins
  • Honor is staring at Brett like he’s an ATM and she’s sitting in a JCB, trying to work the levers

    Honor is staring at Brett like he’s an ATM and she’s sitting in a JCB, trying to work the levers
    May 2 2025
    Brett asks me what she was like when she was younger. I’m like, “Who?” He goes, “Our mother.” And it’s random because I’ve never thought of the old dear ever being – like he said – young.

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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    6 mins