In this episode, host Renae Johnson and therapist Ernesto Martinez discuss the complexities of navigating emotions during the holiday season, particularly for LGBTQ+ individuals. They explore common challenges faced by queer folks, such as dealing with unsupportive family dynamics, managing expectations, and finding joy amidst potential disappointments.

Ernesto emphasizes the importance of agency, self-care strategies like the 'care sandwich,' and the need for open, respectful conversations during family gatherings. The episode provides valuable insights and practical tips for maintaining mental health and fostering connections during the holidays.

Takeaways

• Holidays can bring mixed emotions and unexpected challenges.

• LGBTQ individuals have agency in their family relationships.

• It's okay to stay connected to unsupportive family members for various reasons.

• Expectations can be fluid and should be reassessed based on context.

• Disappointment can arise from unmet expectations, but context matters.

• Conversations should focus on understanding rather than convincing others.

• Using a scale to assess comfort levels can help navigate family dynamics.

• Finding joy and care is essential during the holiday season.

• Pre-care and aftercare can help manage anxiety around family gatherings.

• Chosen family plays a crucial role in supporting mental health.

  
  

Featured Queer Moment of Joy Guest: Crystal Whiteaker with Crystal Lily Creative. To learn more about Crystal visit https://www.crystallily.co/ or on Instagram @crystallilycreative

Therapist Bio:

Ernesto Martinez APCC, AMFT (they/elle/he/el) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Ernesto specializes in working with Adults, Teens, & Parents of Gender Expansive Children, Adult Children of (im)Migrants to transform challenges into stepping stones towards self-compassion, fulfillment, and confidence.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson LPCC, ATR-BC (they/them) founded Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC), a group practice and community hub that focuses on mental health for and by the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities and their allies. Renae is a licensed therapist and board certified art therapist.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Content transparency: n/a

Keywords: holidays, LGBTQ+, family dynamics, mental health, expectations, emotional well-being, self-care, queer affirmation, holiday tips, navigating relationships

The holidays can be tough when family gatherings make you feel the pressure to hide your true self. In this episode of My Therapist is Out!, we explore how queer individuals can navigate the season with authenticity, resilience, and joy.

Join host Renae Johnson and OSTC Clinical Director Kristen Crowe as they share strategies for staying grounded, from creating comforting transitional objects to leaning on chosen family for support. We’ll discuss finding allies within your family, setting boundaries, and even crafting new, affirming traditions that reflect who you truly are.

Whether it’s establishing a safety plan, engaging in self-care, or finding inclusive ways to celebrate, this episode offers tools and insights to help you prioritize your mental health and make the holidays more meaningful. Tune in for a conversation that’s all about creating a space where you belong.

Takeaways

• Many queer individuals feel pressured to hide their identities during family gatherings.

• Creating a transitional object can provide comfort and a sense of home.

• Engaging in activities that affirm one's identity can help during stressful family interactions.

• Chosen family can be a vital source of support during the holidays.

• It's important to establish a safety plan for emotional support before family gatherings.

• Finding allies within the family can help create new traditions.

• Self-care practices are essential for maintaining mental health during the holidays.

• Having a list of supportive contacts can ease feelings of isolation.

• Creating new holiday traditions can foster inclusivity and joy.

• Prioritizing mental health can lead to a more fulfilling holiday experience.

Featured Queer Moment of Joy Guest: Paula Outon from LA Cyclery

Instagram @lacyclery @pauridesla

Therapist Bio:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT (she/they) Is Licensed Therapist, Dance Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson (they/them) founded Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC), a group practice and community hub that focuses on mental health for and by the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities and their allies. Renae is a licensed therapist and board certified art therapist.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective
Content transparency: n/a

We are taking a short break to do some self-care and regroup after this week’s election results. But we’ll be back in less than a month!

In the meantime:

🌈 Take Care of YourselfSelf-care isn’t just a buzzword—it’s the fuel for long-term activism and resilience. Rest, eat, drink water, and check in with yourself. This fight needs you strong, so prioritize your well-being. 💖

🤝 Connect with Your Loved OnesCommunity is our backbone. Spend time with people who lift you up, understand your journey, and support your vision. This connection is a reminder that none of us are in this alone.

💬 Honor Your FeelingsIt’s normal to feel a mix of emotions during times like these. Whether it’s joy, frustration, or exhaustion, allow yourself to experience each feeling fully. Processing these emotions makes space for the work ahead.

🔄 RegroupTake time to center yourself and strategize. Reflect on what’s working, what needs support, and what role you want to play next. Together, we can identify the next steps with clarity and purpose.

🚀 Get Back Into ActionOur journey toward equality didn’t start with this election, and it won’t end here. Every action counts, every voice matters, and we are building the world we believe in, step by step. Keep going with the knowledge that we’re making an impact.

✨ Want proof? See our social media posts for some incredible wins from this election cycle that remind us we’re moving forward! ➡️ Thank you to the teams at @them @impact @latimes for highlighting these important milestones.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson (they/them) founded Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC), a group practice and community hub that focuses on mental health for and by the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities and their allies.

Renae is a licensed therapist and board certified art therapist who specializes in working with queer artists who are exploring their gender identity and recovering from complex trauma. Previous to founding OSTC, Renae spent a decade in community mental health services, providing therapy and as an Operations Director in non-profit organizations serving people experiencing complex co-occurring diagnoses.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Content transparency: cultural trauma

This week host Renae Johnson (they/them) and OSTC therapist Debbie Whyte (she/her) explore if rage can be healthy. Feeling overwhelmed by rage? You’re not alone. For many of us in the LGBTQ+ community, anger is tied to lived experiences of discrimination.

In this episode we answer:

• Ugh I get so angry. Sometimes I just need to scream. Is this ok?

• Can rage help me feel motivated? Sometimes it’s the only thing that gets me going.

• I have lived with depression and rage for a lot of my life. It’s who I am and I don’t want to give that up. Is therapy supposed to change me?

• The world is turned against queer and trans people and I am just infuriated all the time. I feel like my rage is controlling me but there’s so much to be upset about!

• My partner only listens to me if I yell at them. And they REALLY piss me off sometimes. Is it healthy to freak out on them when I’m upset? It’s just me being authentic about how I feel.

Join us as we unpack and embrace rage as an important part of the human experience. What healthy outlets do you use to process these emotions?

Therapist Bio:

Debbie Whyte ATR, APCC (she/her) Is an Associate Therapist and Art Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Debbie specializes in working with queer and BIPOC teens and young adults who are looking to grow into themselves and find their voice.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson (they/them) founded Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC), a group practice and community hub that focuses on mental health for and by the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities and their allies.

Renae is a licensed therapist and board certified art therapist who specializes in working with queer artists who are exploring their gender identity and recovering from complex trauma. Previous to founding OSTC, Renae spent a decade in community mental health services, providing therapy and as an Operations Director in non-profit organizations serving people experiencing complex co-occurring diagnoses.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Content transparency: cultural trauma

Discussed in this episode: RageGround LA

Ever feel like your relationship blueprint is straight out of a toxic family playbook? In this episode of My Therapist is Out!, host Renae Johnson (they/them) and therapist Kristen Crowe (they/she) ask the big question: "Can you actually have healthy relationships if all you’ve seen are the messy, dysfunctional ones growing up?"

Spoiler alert: Yes, you can—but it’s a journey. We’re digging into what it takes to shake off the patterns you grew up with and figure out what a healthy connection even looks like. From setting boundaries to identifying red flags, we’ll chat with a therapist who’s seen it all, and hear from listeners who’ve successfully broken free from the drama-filled cycles of their past.

Think you’re destined to repeat history? Not on our watch. Grab your tea (or something stronger) and let’s get real about what it takes to rewrite the relationship script you inherited.

Therapist Bio:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT (she/they) Is Licensed Therapist, Dance Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson (they/them) founded Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC), a group practice and community hub that focuses on mental health for and by the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities and their allies.

Renae is a licensed therapist and board certified art therapist who specializes in working with queer artists who are exploring their gender identity and recovering from complex trauma. Previous to founding OSTC, Renae spent a decade in community mental health services, providing therapy and as an Operations Director in non-profit organizations serving people experiencing complex co-occurring diagnoses.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Content transparency: family conflict

This week host Renae Johnson (they/them) and OSTC therapist Debbie Whyte (she/her) explore how to be open and discerning when searching for chosen family. Finding your chosen family takes time. It’s all about surrounding yourself with those who really see and support you. But how do you actually do that?

In this episode we discuss:

• What does it mean to “choose” your family? Are these just your friends?

• It’s hard to find friends and close people in your community, much less, “choose” them. Should I be cutting people out if I see a red flag?

• I’m trying to figure out what to do for the holidays and I don’t know if I can count on my chosen family to be there for me. Does this mean they’re not up to par?

• If I decide to have a chosen family, does this mean I am leaving my related family behind?

• I’ve never been close with my related family, and I moved to LA because there was nothing back there for me. I’m usually only close to people I’m sleeping with. Am I supposed to choose a family from this?

Join us as we dive into the real process of Choosing your family and finding people who genuinely get you.

Therapist Bio:

Debbie Whyte ATR, APCC (she/her) Is an Associate Therapist and Art Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Debbie specializes in working with queer and BIPOC teens and young adults who are looking to grow into themselves and find their voice.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson (they/them) founded Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC), a group practice and community hub that focuses on mental health for and by the LGBTQIA+ and BIPOC communities and their allies.

Renae is a licensed therapist and board certified art therapist who specializes in working with queer artists who are exploring their gender identity and recovering from complex trauma. Previous to founding OSTC, Renae spent a decade in community mental health services, providing therapy and as an Operations Director in non-profit organizations serving people experiencing complex co-occurring diagnoses.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Content transparency: family dynamics