
It's Not Me, It's You
Impossible perfectionist, 27, seeks very very very tidy woman
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Narrated by:
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Jon Richardson
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By:
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Jon Richardson
About this listen
A control freak looks for love (women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply).
‘I haven’t woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it’s one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for.’ Jon Richardson
Is your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places? Can you eat a biscuit in the correct way? Then Jon Richardson (single for seven years and counting) could be your ideal man…
Living alone in a one bedroom flat in Swindon, 27 year old Jon has had far too much time on his hands to think. In fact to obsess. About almost everything. Jon’s obssessive compulsive personality disorder has seen him arrange the coins in his pockets in ascending size and colour code his bookshelves. It takes him less than 90 seconds to locate a receipt for a pair of shoes he bought in 1997. Over to the filing cabinet and R for receipts, S for shoes.
But Jon doesn’t want to be like this, in fact he would quite like to share his life with someone. But who could that someone be? Someone like himself, a quarrelsome perfectionist only with breasts and less body hair? Absolutely not. But who exactly is Jon looking for and where will he find her? Faced with a loveless future filled with his own peculiar quirks and perfectionism, Jon sets about his search for The One. The question is, will he mind her keeping the knives to the left of the forks in the cutlery drawer or organising the CDs by genre and not alphabetically?
©2011 Jon Richardson (P)2011 HarperCollins Publishers LimitedCritic reviews
‘Richardson is an OCD-afflicted, grumpy young man who can spin a brilliant routine and could well be the best comic of his generation.’ The Herald
‘Boldly funny and expertly written, it’s a look at dark subjects deftly handled by an engaging comic talent.’ Shortlist
‘Written in his unique style, Jon's quest is a hilarious eye-opener into the mind of a neat freak.’ The Sun
‘I loved Jon’s book. It’s even better than the real thing because you can’t hear his voice.’ Michael McIntyre
‘Jon’s book is just like him. Funny, enjoyable and short.’ Alan Carr
I was a big fan of his comedy, and I assumed this was more of the same but it wasn’t. It left me thinking he wasn’t a particularly nice person, and so I wish I hadn’t bought it, because I liked him beforehand.
It made me dislike him, which I regret
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Jon's journey
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Interesting, honest, a little sad, a little funny
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Excellent Life Philosophy 😂
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A light and funny read
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I would def recommend this to anyone
brilliantly funny/insightful
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A very entertaining listen
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Easy listening
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a fantastic book!
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Omg,such an easy listen
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